Berpatah balik ke berubah terus? mana lg better?

Panjang lak rase title tu..actually, tgah berfikir..mana patot aku jd..kuat mcm dulu? or jd org lain? hmm..lepas ditegur smlm, rase cam nak turn 180 degree..meaning jadi mcm dulu..zaman hidup sorng2 selama setahun lebey tu..tnpa ade sesape dgr cerite, xde tujuan hidup pon mase tu..tp kdng2 bile pkir, walaupon waktu tu aku blurr sgt, tp aku senang..aku xde mnyusahkan org mcm skarang..aku xtau ape aku buat, n aku tak pikir aku yg aku buat tu betol ke salah..ape yg aku rase aku nk, aku buat..tak mcm sekarang..bayangkan, org yg xkenal aku pon, aku bley susahkan die..jumpe baru sekali..xsampai sehari kenal secara berdepan..ok, setahun lebey kenal kat alam maya, xbermakna kenal terus kan..tgn boley taip ape je, mulut boley ckp sesuka hati, tp mata nmpk ape kite wat?? tak kan?? mungkin org yg menugur boley rase, aku apply ke tak ape yg ditegur tu, ape yg aku wat seharian, aku ikot ke ckp org tu..sama mcm umi, tegur aku wat itu ini, tp die tau ke aku wat ke tak..tp aku tau, umi percaya aku buat ape yg die suruh..sbb aku anak die..lebih 20 tahun die kenal aku..berbeza dgn yg setahun kenal di alam maya ni..kepada yg berkenaan, mmg ko boley rasekan yg aku xikot ckp ko, ko rase penat tegur aku, rase sia2 guide aku, letey n mcm2 lg, tp most if ur advice aku ikot..slowly..terpulang nk percaya ke tak..aku tau ko da bosan sgt dah dgr cerita sedih aku, dgr aku mengeluh, dgr aku slalu sakit2, ngadu itu ini..secara jujurnya, aku xtau ape tujuan hidup aku lg, xtau ape hala tuju..kadang2 aku lost! mata celik, tp fikiran kat mane? byk bnde aku kne blajar..tu sbb kdng2 aku mcm org bodo, even ape aku kne wat pon aku xtau..yup, betol, aku kne blajar berdikari..mmg aku tgh try..aku xtau ape aku nk ckp..byk sbenarnye yg ade dlm hati aku ni, yg aku nak ko tau kenape aku jd cmni, tp xterkeluar..tp takpela, ape yg dickp semalam, aku simpan dlm 1 notes as reminder..

thnks for being my ears, my eyes, my mouth..

For all those times you stood by me
For all the truth that you made me see
For all the joy you brought to my life
For all the wrong that you made right
For every dream you made come true
I'll be forever thankful
You're the one who held me up
Never let me fall
You're the one who saw me through through it all


You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn't speak
You were my eyes when I couldn't see
You saw the best there was in me
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach
You gave me faith 'coz you believed


You gave me wings and made me fly
You touched my hand I could touch the sky
I lost my faith, you gave it back to me
You said no star was out of reach
You stood by me and I stood tall

p/s: byk sgt aku nk ckp tp tak tertulis..yg kat atas tu lagu..tp aku cut to make it suitable..thnks brother..